You’re loving people for their flaws because deep down in your gentle tired heart, you actually want someone to love you for all your flaws.
You hope that by loving them for their visible glaring faults, they might one day, in turn, love you, as unconditionally as you love them, for yours.
Now face it, people in the world don’t think the way you do, and they aren’t as kind-hearted as you.
So stop. Stop loving people for their flaws. Just stop –/
There’s nothing lovable about flaws. You need to learn to accept their faults and character cracks. That’s all. Full stop.
You don’t have to romanticize or balloon their faults to love them.
How about this: Love them for their strengths. Love them for their successes and good points.
And at the same time, you must learn to love yourself. Love yourself for everything you excel in. Find something you’re good at and grow from there. Stop deprecating yourself.
Don’t just focus on your failings.
Think of how much you can love yourself for all your shortcomings if you could love those people for all their despicableness.
Remember, you can never hate yourself into a version you or anyone else will love.
Then, I hope you’ll be able to find the happiness you’ve been pretending to have.