If today I wrote a piece of music,

I would begin the composition with a chord 5. That’s so me, always beginning something suddenly and oftentimes abruptly.

I’d continue the song with a 1c, when I actually intended to link chord 5 to chord 1. It’s like how I always try to express myself but never really saying what I really want to say and it’s not because I don’t want to but because I don’t know how to anymore.

And then it all starts to go downhill when I discover that I am actually writing in the key of C minor deviating from the key i had originally planned to write in: C major.

Being trapped in C minor, I would probably use diminished chords and dissonant harmonies that would produce unnatural confused sounds trying in vain, with futile pathetic attempts, to describe the chaos and mess that I feel inside myself.

As the song continues, maybe I would fit in a Neapolitan 6 to try to change the color from black to gray and see what happens. If anything goes wrong, I’ll just use another N6 to switch it right back to black. 

The only problem now is that my ears are starting to bleed from all the minor sounds. 

The last time I picked up my manuscript book and pen to compose a piece of music, I wrote a song in a major key perfectly, but it began to rain as I finished it so I closed the piece with a relative minor chord. 

I’m sick of hearing the C minor dominate this piece, at the same time I’m afraid that a change to a major key might ruin everything and i haven’t written in major for so long I probably have forgotten the rules and end up making so many mistakes in the composition. 

And yet, I am sick of hearing the minor scale. 

So today, I closed my eyes and prayed for a bit more hope, a bit more strength, a bit more courage, to be able to find some beauty in the storm, to look forward to something brighter in the tomorrows. 

And maybe, if I have found enough courage to move the key into major, I can  finish this piece with a perfect cadence at last.

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