I often wonder to how great an extent can one hurt on the inside.
I wonder how the pain of losing a loved one, like the fabric of life that held everything together being torn apart, can crawl its way through the outside and steal its way into the heart and soul of a person and eat at the person until he is so empty of emotions.
I wonder how can the inside of one hurt so much and feel so different and the outside, things like the world, remain unchanged. As a family mourns the sudden death of a loved one, behind the room of sorrow and pain, separated by just a cold brick cement wall, people carry on with life and their business, unaffected.
And the pain I’m talking about is not the wailing on the streets or the tearing at the hair.
I’m talking about the pain that eats you up and something shrinking inside of you and you know you will never be the same.
I wonder how long can one bear that kind of pain.
And I wonder how long I will have to wonder.